Mad Reviews - 2001: A Space Odyssey (Reprise)

Boy did I ever fuck up with this one...

Welcome back, everyone! I know I've been absent from reviewing for over half a year. I apologize for that as I've been making changes in my personal life and moving forward with my other ambitions... Such as music, being awesome, etc. But now, I'm back, baby!

Alright, so as you know, my first review on this blog was of the Stanley Kubrick sci-fi classic 2001: A Space Odyssey. Feel free to read it in the following link before moving forward:

http://madmikeofmetal.blogspot.ca/2014/04/mad-reviews-2001-space-odyssey.html

As you can see, that review was very mixed. To be honest, I wasn't too impressed with this movie when I saw it for the first time, and my review reflected that greatly. But now, after watching it a few more times, all I have to say is this: I fucked up.

Yes, I know it's hard for a fucking egotistical prick such as myself to admit it... But it's true. I fucked up, I shit the bed, I missed the mark, I screwed the pooch, I dun goofed. This movie is absolutely brilliant, and I'm glad I managed to give it another chance. Mr. Kubrick, wherever you are, I have to say I'm sorry for that last review. I hope I can make up for it on this one. 

So where do I start? Well, where the movie starts, I guess... The opening shot is gorgeous, beautifully depicting a crescent Earth rising above the moon, followed by the sun rising above Earth. This shot is played along to the sounds of Richard Strauss's Also Sprach Zarathustra, which has now become synonymous with the film. Fuck it, I'll just post it here because my words can't describe it:

Simply epic

Yeah, brilliant eh? This opening sets the tone and lets you know that you'll be in for what can only be described as a visual symphony. 

That's where I missed the mark entirely in the previous review. I was overly critical over the lack of character development, the wooden acting, lack of story, and the film's over-reliance on visuals. Well, I now realize that's the whole point! It's not supposed to tell a specific story, it's not supposed to be some in-depth character study of Hal or Dr. Bowman, and it's not supposed to be full of expositional dialogue. 2001 is meant to be an out of body experience, it takes you on a long journey through space, time, and music. As stated before, it moves along like a symphony... And just like a symphony, you're meant to sit down and take everything in. You listen to every note, every passage, every movement... And at the end of it all, you interpret it on your own.

Ok, enough of that.. Where else did I fuck up? Oh yeah... In the last review I talked about how the pacing is needlessly slow. Well, looking at it again, I have to say that I liked the film's slow pace. It adds to overall eerie and mysterious tone of the movie, and it allows you to soak all the visuals in. Plus, space travel is slow as fuck, so it only makes sense that a movie about space travel would be slow-paced as well. 

As for the lack of character development, I messed up there too. I thought this whole movie was supposed to be about the struggles of the human characters as well as the man apes, not even realizing that the main character of this movie is the monolith itself! This monolith is meant be an alien being, there to help the advancement of mankind at every stage of its evolution... Seriously, that flew over my head the first time.

I also went on about how the ending was just some contrived bullshit.. Well, I was wrong there too. As stated before, this movie is a journey. It's taking you on yet another journey as the monolith splits the fabric of space and time. We see terrifically drawn up visuals, spliced in with still shots of Dr. Bowman's terrified face, inverted color shots of canyons and lakes, and what can only be described as space jizz. We're then transported to a hotel room, where we see Dr. Bowman grow older and older to the point of death. He is then reborn as humanity's next stage of evolution: The Starchild. At least that's how I interpret it now...

As for Hal, well... He's an even better villain after a few viewings! He's a technically perfect being, incapable of error. Which goes to show just how cold and calculating he is when he kills everyone on board and leaves Bowman out in the dust. From Hal's point of view, he didn't make a mistake, he was simply doing what was best for the mission itself. Unfortunately, it got everyone killed and turned Bowman into a space loner.

Now I'm not going to touch on the genius of the Dawn of Man sequence as I've already thouched on that in my previous review. With this review, I'm basically asking myself: How did this film go over my head the first time?

To answer that question, I have to turn to none other than Stanley Kubrick himself. 

This is a director who makes very unique movies. All of them require multiple viewings before they can truly be appreciated. Heck, I didn't really like Dr. Strangelove until I saw it a few times, and now it's one of my favourite comedies and still my favourite Kubrick movie! I also didn't fully appreciate A Clockwork Orange or Full Metal Jacket the first time I watched them either. Same goes for 2001 now, and it's safe to say that I have converted. 2001: A Space Odyssey is every bit the sci-fi masterpiece it's built up to be, and one of the most distinct and unique films ever made. It's full of awe, wonder, great visuals and an antagonist for the ages. I love it now, and I'm so happy I've come to fully appreciate it. 

5 stars out of 5. 

And now to get this review blog up and running again. Welcome back! See you in my next review as I'll be tackling another classic film... This time directed by Martin Scorsese. Until then, here's the ending to 2001:

 

- Mad Mike of Metal

Mad Lists: Top 10 Directors

Hello my fellow readers (all 3 of them), and welcome to my November edition of Mad Lists! One of my favourite directors of all time, Christopher Nolan, is coming out with his new movie Interstellar this weekend. With that, I've decided to do a top 10 list of my all time favourite directors. Some of my selections may shock you, some you might agree with, and some might make you call me a retard 10 000 times for putting them on there. Whatever the case, just keep on reading and let me know what you think when you're done.

By the way, don't let the above picture deceive you... Senor Spielbergo will not be on this list... But his unionized American equivalent just might be!

Anyways, let's get on with this, shall we?

10. Stanley Kubrick

Yes, one of the most beloved directors of all time is all the way down at number 10 on my list. So I imagine that most of you are saying this to me right now:

Okay, so before anyone sends a package of anthrax to my house, let me make my case. First of all, just because he's at the bottom of this top 10 list doesn't mean that I think he's a bad director, in fact, I really like most of his movies! I just don't really like his movies as much as I like movies from other directors on this list. For example: I thoroughly like A Clockwork Orange, but at the same time, I've seen better character studies, and I've seen youth debauchery presented in much better ways. The movie that everyone calls his best, that being 2001: A Space Odyssey, is the most overrated movie I've ever seen in my life and does not deserve all the accolades it gets in my opinion (you can read more of my thoughts on that movie here).

With that being said though, most of his other movies are awesome! Full Metal Jacket is one of the best war movies I've ever seen, The Shining still scares the living shit out of me, and the aforementioned A Clockwork Orange is a disturbingly great film! What is my favourite Kubrick movie, you ask? Well, I've got to say it's Dr. Strangelove, that movie is a black comedy masterpiece and one of the funniest movies I've ever watched. If you don't agree with that, then you'll have to answer to the Coca Cola company!

Why else is he so low on this list? Well, the guy is a mastermind when it comes to cinematography, as he can set up a shot like it's nobody's business, but when it comes to characterization and narrative, he's not the best at it. His style can get a little self-indulgent at times and it can get old really quick, and even when his films' narrative flow and character development are at their best, I've still seen better. Do you disagree? Are you pissed? Well, wait until you see who I put ahead of him!
 


9. John McTiernan

 
Don't know the name? Well, you definitely know his movies. He's the director of such action classics like Die Hard, Predator, and The Hunt for Red October. Outside of that, he's also made Die Hard With A Vengeance and the eternally misunderstood and under-appreciated action satire Last Action Hero. He's the quintessential action director, with a feel for suspense that matches that of Hitchcock. Yes, I put this guy ahead of Kubrick... You mad bro?

Another of McTiernan's strengths is his ability to portray great character development. This guy's movies feature some legendary characters, such as John McClane, The Predator, Hans Gruber, Marko Ramius, Dutch, and Jack Slater. As mentioned before, his most under-appreciated movie is Last Action Hero, it was a brilliant satire that had fun with all of the action movie clichés that McTiernan himself had a hand in inventing. Think of it as the Scream of action movies. It was also great to see Arnie pretty much making fun of himself throughout the whole thing.

Favourite movie? Well, as much as I love LAH, and as awesome as Predator and The Hunt for Red October are, this one is a no-brainer: Die Hard. It was an action game changer and features both one of the greatest heroes and greatest villains in movie history (that being John McClane and Hans Gruber). It's one of my favourite films of all time and one of the best pure action thrillers ever made.

Granted, the ladder half of his career hasn't been good to him (Rollerball, The 13th Warrior, Basic... yikes!), but he's definitely left his footprint in movie history and he will always be a favourite of mine.



8. Paul Verhoeven

Once again, you probably don't know the name, but after seeing that pic, you know at least one of his movies! Verhoeven's style is one that is completely over the top, but with a darkly-humourous, satirical sensibility. He has the ability to entertain any kind of audience, while making his movies turn a mirror on western society and showcasing all of its ugliness and ridiculousness. Do you disagree with him being on the list? Well, I'm just going to take some time to explain why and I'll be back home in time for corn flakes!

A Dutch-born director who began his career in Europe, he came on the Hollywood scene in 1987 with the masterpiece that is Robocop and has never looked back, with massively entertaining gems like the Sci-Fi mindfuck Total Recall, the classic erotic thriller Basic Instinct, the epitome of so-bad-it's-good Showgirls, and the pure fucking awesome pile of cheese: Starship fucking Troopers! Ok, yes, he made Hollow Man after all of that, but the stench of that movie doesn't erase the the brilliance of his movies before it.

To some, his style may seem disjointed, cheesy, and too over-the-top for its own good. But I think that's the point of so many of his films! They're meant to be action oriented, tongue-in-cheek social satires that are not only fun as hell at face value, but are smart and thought provoking beneath the surface. Verhoeven is a filmmaker who knows what he's best at, and does a masterful job of presenting himself.

My favourite film of his is Robocop without a doubt. It was a movie that was tailor-made to fit his style and the result was an absolute masterpiece of biblical proportions. I still have love for Total Recall, as Arnie's cheesy style of acting was a perfect match for Verhoeven, and Starship Troopers is just plain fucking awesome. I do think Showgirls is a pretty decent film: Once you look past the horrible acting and the gratuitous nudity, it's actually a pretty good satire of show business and the chauvinistic Hollywood lifestyle. Yeah, Hollow Man was awful, but hey, even the best can fail at times... I mean... David Fincher made Alien 3... 

Oh, spoiler alert...

7. David Fincher

Another director who has a style all to his own, David Fincher began his directorial career in the music video business, his most iconic video being Aerosmith's "Janie's Got a Gun." From that platform, he jumped onto the Hollywood scene in the early 90's. Things didn't start out well for Fincher, as he received the directors credit for the abomination Alien 3. But from then on, he has become one of the most respected directors making movies today!

His resume includes the classic neo-noir cop thriller Se7en, the masterpiece that is Fight Club, the underrated-as-fuck Panic Room, the game changing The Social Network, and his latest piece of awesomeness: Gone Girl. Like Verhoeven, Fincher has a knack for turning a mirror on society and showcasing it's ugliness to his audience. The only difference is that Fincher's social commentary is much more subtle, which fits perfectly with his dark, gritty, character driven style of filmmaking. 

Yes, Alien 3 will always be a black eye on his legacy, so much so that he has publicly disowned the movie, but everything since then has been gold to say the least. Favourite movie of his? Well, Fight Club without a doubt, followed closely by Gone Girl, Se7en, The Social Network, The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo... aww fuck, any movie of his not named Alien 3! Fincher is a living legend, if you haven't watched any of his movies... Why?

6. Clint Eastwood

Most people know Clint Eastwood as one of the most badass actors on the planet, playing some legendary characters such as The Man with No Name, Inspector Harry Callahan, Walt Kowalski, and William Munny. But what most people forget is that Eastwood is also a pretty fucking awesome director. He has two Best Director Oscars in his name, and some of his films are frequently mentioned as some of the greatest movies ever made.

Eastwood directorial resume is so long that I don't think I can touch on all of them. He made his directorial debut with Play Misty For Me in 1971 and has never looked back. He directed two of the best westerns of the 70s: High Plains Drifter and The Outlaw Josey Wales; he made some notable films in the 80s like The Honky Tonk Man and Pale Rider. But he really came into his own as a director when the 90s came around. In 1992, he directed Unforgiven, which in my opinion is the best western not directed by Sergio Leone, and that won him his first Oscar. Since then he's made gems like The Bridges of Madison County, Absolute Power, Mystic River, Space Cowboys, Flags of Our Fathers, Letters From Iwo Jima, and Invictus. He won his second Oscar in 2005 for the heart-wrenching boxing movie Million Dollar Baby, and should've been nominated for another one for the flat-out awesome Gran Torino!

Was that tough to keep up with? Yeah, it was for me too, but it just goes to show how much this man has done in his career. What's my favourite of his, you ask? Well, as much as I love Unforgiven, I have to go with Gran Torino. That movie was a brilliant portrayal of a bitter old man in his dying days, and very subtly portrays the horrors of a gang lifestyle. The dialogue in that movie is fucking hilarious, too!

Sure, Eastwood can be hit or miss at times (just see Trouble with the Curve if you want proof of that), but his hits far outweigh his misses, and that's good enough to put him on this list.



5. Christopher Nolan

Cracking the top 5 on this list is one of the most respected directors of the last 15 years. Nolan is known for having intricate plots, crisp cinematography, and very grounded, gritty tones. He has a knack to create suspense out of thin air, and has the ability to keep his audiences engaged and invested in the film even throughout some of his lengthiest efforts. He may polarize moviegoers at times, but for my money, he's one of the best directors making movies today.

He has brought Batman back to life, he squeezed one last great performance out of Al Pacino,  cast Robin Williams against type to which he made a terrific performance, and has repeatedly given us some of the greatest psychological thrillers of our time. He told a story backwards in Memento, given us the story of a sleepless corrupt cop in Insomnia, completely revolutionized comic book movies with The Dark Knight trilogy, and gave us the dreamy mindfuck Inception. Time will tell if Interstellar will hold up to the rest of his films, but his resume is, movie for movie, one of the best of the 21st century.

Most people consider The Dark Knight to be his best movie. Well, I have to go along with that crowd as well. It is a masterpiece and in my opinion the greatest superhero movie ever made. Batman Begins and The Dark Knight Rises are right up there for me as well, and my favourite film of his outside of the Dark Knight Trilogy is Insomnia. It features Al Pacino's last great role, and arguably the most eerily creepy performance of Robin Williams's career. All of that is more than enough for me to put him on this list!



4. Quentin Tarantino

This selection probably won't shock anyone, and why should it? He's one of the best directors of all time and has one of the most unique, distinctive directorial styles ever. When you watch a Tarantino movie, you KNOW it's a Tarantino movie! While some directors can sometimes be too self indulgent for their own good, Tarantino uses his quirky, unapologetic, ultra-violent, razor sharp witty style to serve his stories instead of serving himself. That's the mark of a great filmmaker! 

Most of you know his movies by now: Reservoir Dogs, Pulp Fiction, Four Rooms, Jackie Brown, Kill Bill, Inglourious Basterds, Django Unchained, and his highly anticipated 2015 western, The Hateful Eight. Many of these films are regarded by many as masterpieces and some of the greatest movies of our generation! That is especially the case for Pulp Fiction, as it  has shown up on many "best of" lists since it's release. Three of his movies have been nominated for Best Picture at the Oscars and Tarantino himself has been nominated for best director twice... Each time he got robbed, horribly... But at least he's won some oscars for writing! And that's another talent he has: writing. His knack for chalking up memorable dialogue is like no other. Every line he writes is so quotable and memorable that it's impossible to think of his best piece of writing. His writing style fits perfectly with his filmmaking style and it adds to Tarantino's distinctiveness as a storyteller.

My favourite film of his is obviously Pulp Fiction, with Django Unchained being my second favourite and Kill Bill trailing right behind it. There's nothing more I can say about this guy that hasn't already been said, other than the fact that his writing is on par with Scorsese's and his cinematography is on par with Leone's...

 

Oops, nothing like giving it away, eh?

 

3. Sergio Leone

Those who me knew that they'd be seeing this BAMF on this list somehere. He takes the bronze medal on this top 10 and has made some of the nastiest, dirtiest, badass-iest movies ever! Leone is known for his westerns, which is fitting, because he'd probably be one bad motherfucking outlaw if he lived in that time period. Heck, his name alone looks and sounds like it belongs on an old 1800's wanted poster!

His filmmaking resume isn't as big a others on this list, as Leone only has 8 films to his name. In this case though, it's quality over quantity. An Italian native, he fell in love with American westerns in the 50's and always wanted to make one of his own. After making Gli ultimi giorni di Pompei (The Last Days of Pompeii) and Il Colosso di Rodi (The Colossus of Rhodes) in the late 50s/early 60s, he finally got his chance. The release of A Fistful of Dollars (a western retelling of Akira Kurosawa's Yojimbo) in 1964 changed the landscape of the western genre forever. With this release, he popularized the "Spaghetti Western" subgenre, put Clint Eastwood on the map, and the film itself spawned two sequels, in what would become known as the Dollars Trilogy. For a Few Dollars More was the second installment of this trilogy, and it was much darker and more sinister than AFOD in my opinion, it also made a star out of Lee Van Cleef, Eastwood's counterpart in that movie. Then, in 1966, Leone directed one of the greatest movies of all time: The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly. With great performances from Van Cleef, Eastwood, and Eli Wallach, not to mention the gorgeous and stunning cinematography, Leone had finally perfected his craft, and the result was outstanding. I've gone in depth about TGTBATU  in my review of the movie, so I won't say much more about it... But my god, that movie still holds up today!

Leone wasn't done after the Dollars Trilogy though, as in 1968, he released another landmark western masterpiece: Once Upon a Time in the West. Like his previous movie, I've already reviewed OUATITW so I won't bore you any further with that. That film spawned another two sequels which would become known as the "Once Upon a Time..." Trilogy. This trilogy included the Spaghetti Western self-parody Duck, You Sucker (released internationally as Once Upon a Time... The Revolution) in 1972. Then, after 10 years of work, he released his final film, the 4-hour gangster epic Once Upon a Time in America, starring Robert De Niro. That movie was a fantastic swan song and a big "Fuck You!" to any critic who considered Leone a one-trick pony.

As you may already know, my favourite film of his is The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly; but in all honesty, that was a tough choice, because I consider all of his films to be brilliant! His artistic vision, and his way of letting his visuals tell his stories are matched by no one. Like Tarantino, Leone's style is one that is his own, and his films are ones that everyone should see before they die.



2. Martin Scorsese

Where Leone was quality over quantity, Martin Scorsese's quality matches his quantity, more or less. This guy is so good that he can probably make a groundbreaking film in his sleep by now. He's what I consider to be the master of character studies, and has a very documental, fly-on-the-wall style that presents his stories and allows his audience to make the judgments. There is no other director like him, and he takes the runner-up spot on this list!

Scorsese's long ass resume speaks for itself: Mean Streets, Taxi Driver, Raging Bull, The King of Comedy, The Last Temptation of Christ, fucking GOODFELLAS, Cape Fear, Casino, Gangs of New York, The Aviator, The Departed, Hugo, The Wolf of Wall Street... Umm... how does he only have 1 Oscar again? The Academy actually thought that a Kevin Costner movie was better than a Scorsese movie at one time... think about that for a second: THEY THOUGHT KEVIN COSTNER MADE A BETTER MOVIE THAN SCORSESE DID... ARE THESE PEOPLE FUCKED?

Before I start snapping, let me get to my next point... The reason why Scorsese is so high on this list (and even my number 1 pick is somewhat guilty of doing the following) is this: While this guy has been making amazing movies since the 70s, he's never stopped to smell the roses, he still hasn't put his feet up and rested on his legacy. He still challenges himself even after 40+ years in the business and the results are still amazing to watch... Hugo is a huge testament to that! 

Favourite Scorsese movie? I have to pick Goodfellas, it's one of my all time favourite films, and for my money, the best mafia film ever made! Taxi Driver is a very close second, as I consider that to be the best pure character study I've ever seen. De Niro's performance in that movie still gives me chills. I also love The Departed, Raging Bull, The Wolf of Wall Street, and Hugo to death. The only Scorsese film that I wasn't a big fan of was Shutter Island, but even then, the movie was still pretty good. Marty is one of the most beloved filmmakers of all time, and I have to join his massive fan club!

So you're probably wondering, if Scorsese isn't number one, then who is? Well, I'll tell you... after these honourable mentions...


Honourable Mentions:



Steven Spielberg

 

His exclusion might be the most surprising. Well, outside of Jurassic Park, Schindler's List, and maybe Raiders, I'm not the biggest fan of his work. He's made good movies, he just hasn't made many great movies. Also, ET is fucking terrible...

Francis Ford Coppola

Why is he an honourable mention? Because he directed The Godfather and The Godfather Part II...

Why is he not in the top 10? Because he directed The Godfather Part III...

Alfred Hitchcock

 

I've only seen Psycho, and even though I love that movie, it wasn't enough to put him on this list. I am going to catch up on his movies, and if I like enough of them, I just might redo this top 10 in the future.

Brad Bird

 

The Iron Giant, The Incredibles, Ratatouille, and Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol. Not too shabby, he'd probably be number 11 or 12 on this list.

Ridley Scott

 

This guy is the poster boy for hit or miss. But I had to mention the guy who made Alien 

Sam Mendes

 

American Beauty and Skyfall... Aaaaaaaaaaaaaannnnd not much else

JJ Abrams

He brought Star Trek back to life
 

Nicholas Meyer

 

He brought Star Trek back to life... Twice!

Mel Brooks

 

I feel bad for keeping him off... and then I remember that Dracula parody... ughhh.

The Coen Brothers

 

I enjoy their movies, I just enjoy other directors's movies more...

Tim Burton

If I made this list in 1999, he'd definitely be on it... But then Alice in Wonderland happened... And Dark Shadows... And Big Fish... And Charlie and the Chocolate Factory... Yeahhh no...




And now, the moment you've all been waiting for: my number 1 favourite movie director of all time is....




1. James Cameron

Yep... I'm pretty sure I've mentioned this at some point on this blog, but James Cameron is my favourite director. Now, if this list was about how directors are as people, he'd be nowhere on this list because he's a fucking asshole... But as a filmmaker, this guy is a mastermind. Everything that I love to see in movies, I can see in his movies. His movies are action packed, they have complex but coherent plots, awesome quotes and one-liners, amazing characters, strong character development, and brilliant, breathtaking visuals. He has a very perfectionist style, as he's very meticulous and leaves no stone unturned in his movies. Since his films tend to be a hybrid of multiple genres, it requires the attention to detail that only he can offer. Hence why no one besides Cameron has been able to make a good Terminator movie... Yeah.

After seeing Star Wars in 1977, he decided to quit his job driving a truck and to get into the filmmaking industry. He made his feature length debut in 1981 with Piranha II: The Spawning. The movie was a total failure, but there was a silver lining to that mess: During production, the stress of having to work in Italy with a crew that didn't speak English gave him a massive nightmare. In this nightmare, he was being chased by a robotic skeleton. He carried this image in his head for years, and in 1984, this robot came to life on the big screen in The Terminator. Produced on a modest budget and starring a then unknown Arnold Schwarzenegger, The Terminator was a box office success and has gone to be known as one of the greatest movies ever made.

That was only the beginning for Cameron, as in 1986, he released Aliens, a sequel to Ridley Scott's 1979 Sci-fi/Horror classic Alien. Combining his own brand of action with the sci-fi and horror elements of the original, Aliens was a complete success both commercially and critically, and has gone down as one of the greatest sequels ever made. He followed that with 1988's The Abyss, the most underrated film in his repertoire. Set in a research tank at the bottom of the sea, the film combines suspense, relentless thrills and (near the ending) awe and wonder. The visuals in that movie were way ahead of their time, and they still look great today! The Abyss wasn't as successful as his previous 2 films, but it didn't disappoint Cameron for long, because his masterpiece was right around the corner...

In 1991, he directed, wrote and produced what would be, in my humble opinion, his best movie and my all time favourite movie: Terminator 2: Judgment Day. A sequel to his 1984 original, T2 was a game changer not only for action movies and sci-fi movies, but for special effects and CGI as well. It his highly regarded as one of the best, if not THE best, sequels ever made, not to mention one of the best films ever made. It ended up winning 4 Academy Awards (Best Sound Mixing, Best Sound Editing, Best Makeup, and Best Visual Effects) which in my opinion was not enough! Everything about T2: the action, the story, the effects, the acting, the cinematography, was perfect! Okay, I won't jerk that movie off any further, moving on...

Cameron showed no signs of slowing down, releasing the fucking awesome action-comedy True Lies in 1994, and then, in 1997, he directed the movie that finally got the Academy to give him the respect he deserves: Titanic. I'm part of the small male crowd that will admit to loving this movie. That movie's love story is what it is, but I thought it was a very accurate representation of what might have actually happened on that fateful 1912 morning... and... yes... a few moments in that movie had me tearing up...

Hey! That scene where you the mom holding the baby frozen in the water... Gah, that's too much man! Anyways, Titanic won 11 Oscars, including Best Picture and a long overdue Best Director Oscar for Cameron. Afterwards, he focused on some independent passion project for nearly a decade, until he directed 2009's Avatar. This movie was a groundbreaking 3D film, with amazing visuals and a pretty good adventure. I do consider this film to be his weakest effort, but I still love the movie! Heck, there's not a single movie of his that I don't love thoroughly (Piranha II notwithstanding), and that's why he's number 1 on my list.

Are you happy with that selection? Are you pissed? Well, make your own top 10 list then! Then we could compare and have endless arguments over the internet!



Well, there you have it, those are my top 10 favourite directors of all time, and I hope you enjoyed reading this list. Feel free to browse through my blog and completely crap on every single article that I've made... I'm out

- Mad Mike of Metal
 

Mad Reviews: 2001 A Space Odyssey

 

Well, this is it. THE Sci-fi epic, the space movie to end all space movies, what is widely regarded as the greatest science fiction movie ever made, 2001: A Space Odyssey.

This movie has been on my watch list for a very long time. Everybody I've talked to that has seen it has told me it’s a masterpiece, and they've had the critics to back it up: It has a 95% approval rating on rotten tomatoes and the AFI named it the greatest Sci-fi movie of all time. I thought to myself "Really?" so they think it’s better than such Sci-fi/Space Epics like the Star Wars trilogy, Terminator 1 & 2, Alien, Aliens, Back to the Future, Jurassic Park, and Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan? Well, since it was being held to such a high esteem, I told myself that I would watch it the first chance I got...

So when I saw this movie on sale for 10$ on Blu Ray the other day, I didn't waste any time to buy and watch the movie that everyone considers to be one of the best movies ever made. And after watching it, I ask this question: ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?

Okay, before anyone forms a lynch mob, I will say that I like this movie. I thought it was visually stunning, ahead of its time, and thrilling, but the greatest Sci-fi movie ever made? Hell no.

In my opinion, it's not the best Sci-fi movie ever made, it's not the greatest space thriller ever made, it's definitely not Stanley Kubrick's masterpiece, heck, it's not even the best movie of 1968 (that title belongs to Once Upon a Time in the West). It's a good movie, I'll give it that, but it's horrendously overrated, and allow me to explain why in this review

I’ll start off with what I liked about the movie. I thought the “Dawn of Man” sequence was brilliant. It represents how man, even at his earliest stages, was violent and territorial, and how we are at our most creative when times are at their most desperate. Seriously, using the bone of a dead animal to knock your enemy the fuck out with? That’s awesome. The gang of man-apes also discovers a black monolith prior to inventing the bone club, and they worship it like a god. I figured I’d mention that because the monolith becomes a big focal point in the movie. All in all, I love this whole sequence (which includes that cool match cut) and it’s definitely one of the film’s strong points.

Another strong point is the visuals. The gorgeous shots of space, spaceships and planets are amazingly well crafted, especially for its time. The shot of the sun setting (or rising?) over the monolith is breathtaking, and the shots of Jupiter and the moon are just beautiful. I don’t know how many hours Kubrick spent drawing all of it up, but everything looked great. There is something about the visuals that annoyed me, but I’ll get to that later.

The biggest thing the movie has going for it is HAL 9000. That red-eyed machine completely owns this fucking movie. Created as a perfect robot in control of the ship, HAL is forced to keep a secret from the crew. This secret leads to him “malfunctioning” and killing off everyone but Dr. Bowman. HAL, who happens to be a good lip reader, finds out the waking members of the crew are onto him and are planning on shutting him down, so what does he do? He blasts one of them in the coldness of space and traps Dr. Bowman outside of the ship, leading to one of the most memorable quotes of all time (Sorry, I won’t recite the quote, I’m afraid I can’t do that). Cold, ruthless, quotable, and diabolical, he is one of the greatest movie villains I’ve ever seen…

Eventually, Bowman gets to Hal’s brain and begins to shut him down circuit by circuit. It’s done to the point where you actually feel sorry for that poor robot… Mostly because he’s such a badass character and deserves an entire movie for him to be all badass and shit. I see this as a perfect segue into the problems I have with this movie…

First of all, as awesome as a character HAL is, he’s in the movie for only one act, and is killed off pretty damn quickly. The reason why I have a problem with that is because… well… He’s the only interesting character this movie has!

Seriously, there are no other characters in this movie worth giving a rat’s ass about! This movie has little to no dialogue, or character development for that matter. I understand that Kubrick was trying to tell a story through visuals, and make it more of an experience than a movie… But Jesus Christ! Give your characters some depth for fuck sakes! That way, when Hal kills them off, we as an audience can:

1 – Feel sad that these people died

2 – Feel hatred for Hal

3 – Root for Bowman to kill Hal off, instead of rolling our eyes when Hal is shut down because the movie then relegates back to a slow, colossal bore full of overlong visuals and a bland main character.

I need to speak of another problem I had with this movie: The pacing is unbelievably slow… How slow, you ask? Well, it makes M. Night Shyamalan look like he has ADD. Now, before anyone reading this accuses me of being a Michael Bay fan, I just happen to like slow paced movies. Among my favourite movies of all time include some slow epics like The Godfather (Part I and II), the Dollars Trilogy, Alien, The Shawshank Redemption, etc. The difference between those movies and this one is: While slow paced, something interesting is going on! There’s an interesting conversation, there’s a brilliantly paced standoff, there’s a cop getting shot in a restaurant. In this movie, almost nothing is happening! We have to sit through what feels like an eternity just to watch a shuttle dock with that god damn space station!  I understand that 2001’s slow pace was intended to keep the audience in suspense and allow the audience to enjoy the visuals, but for me, it was just agonizing to sit through, I just wanted something to happen! Anything! That’s why Hal’s presence was so crucial in this movie, because he at least made shit go down! But no, he had to die to make room for more pointless visuals…

That brings me to my next point: Remember when I said there was something about the visuals that bugged me? Well here it is: While these visuals are absolutely beautiful and meticulously well done, most of these shots are left on screen for way too long! To me, the style was getting shoved in our faces instead of actually serving the plot. Okay, I get it, Mr. Kubrick, you put a lot of effort into drawing this shit up, and you did a wonderful job, but… can we get back to the story? Can that monolith blow up more eardrums? Can we see what Hal is up to? Maybe you can give the visuals a break for 15 minutes so we can get some of Dr. Bowman’s character flushed out? No? Okay…

Now I’m getting to my biggest problem with this movie: The ending. Everything wrong with this movie comes together here: No Hal in sight, it’s slow for the sake of slow, and the well done visuals are eating up too much celluloid. After the Dawn of Man sequence, we sit through roughly 2 hours of Hal and nothingness, only to see Dr. Bowman make contact with the monolith, go on an acid trip, wind up in a hotel room with older versions of him, and finally, turn into a fetus floating towards earth… What the fuck?

From what I’ve read, this was meant to be an ambiguous ending that is left open for interpretation… Well, I interpreted it as dumb nonsensical bullshit. It’s only use was for Kubrick to shove more of his visuals in our faces instead giving us something coherent. But who knows, maybe I’m just one of the people that “Didn’t get it.” This part just flew over my head, I guess… If you managed to find meaning to this ending, good for you. It just didn't work for me.

In conclusion, while 2001 has big problems, this movie is nice to look at (to an extent), Hal is awesome, Dawn of Man is the work of genius, and the soundtrack gives you shivers. It’s a good movie, a very good movie… But one of the greatest films ever made? Far from it.

I give this movie a full 3 stars out of 5. I like it, but I don’t love it.

Feel free to use the comments section to tell me what you think of this movie.

- Mad Mike of Metal